Not liveblogging, but close. Following are my thoughts as I listened in on the SOU speech tonight. Call it haiku coverage. Blink journalism. Here goes:

Wondering what war hero or mother of a killed infantryman will be present tonight. Always hated that days of our lives strategy.

Opens with King comments…nice. Almost a must, but still a good move. Brings back memories of New Orleans.

Actually pronounced the word rostrum correctly! Sweet George!

Civil tone he wants…LOL. Goodwill and respect for others – gotta love it.

George really needs a better comb…got bed head. Talking about securing peace, etc. but I keep looking at the bed head. They must have shaken him awake from his nap to come give a speech.

There we go…9/11 reference. No word on Osama…but…oh, there it is WMD!!! LOL. Go George! Freedom in the world, but uh no mention of Hamas. He’s ripping it up! Freedom, freedom, freedom. Democracies are spreading…we got 122 now. Woohaa! Purple finger reference. blah, blah, blah. Wants free Syria, Iran, and North Korea. (by any means necessary?).

Radical Islam…oh shit…he just mentioned bin Laden. What about him George? Where is bin Laden. New phrase: Weapons of Mass Murder – WMM. Don’t like the ring. Not gonna stick.

Terrorists vs. Us. blah, blah, blah. We love freedom and will fight to keep it. When the fuck was OUR freedom in danger? Got it twisted George…you took freedoms away with the Patriot Act.

George is against isolationism…gotta go fight the evil doers. Can’t retreat. Gotta bang our heads into the monster and keep getting kids killed all over the world so we can be free here. Won’t surrender to evil…blah, blah, blah. I guess we can’t back down from Saudi Arabia then huh?

Moving the world toward peace…haha…offensive in Afhanistan and Iraq. Clear plan for victory. Wow. Build a modern economy so all Iraqis can live in lower middle class squalor…uh, um..fuck..i mean live in the great land of freedom…or whatever.

…tuning out…..not saying shit….almost all sounds like Charlie Brown’s teacher at this point

half stand, half sit…yada yada…

hindsight not wisdom and second guessing not a strategy. musta been big PR money for that one. killer. bin Laden would be in control of Iraq if we leave? grinning like a shit eatin’ cat right about now.

dead soldier reference…his family is there and they stand. i heart you mister president…i heart you. standing O. Teary eyes. teary wink from Bush. sacrifices of military families…or they ones who agree with me and the war anyway. fuck some Sheehan.

How to defeat terrorists? Give them political freedom. LOL. Hamas maybe? Opposition is OK as long as it is peaceful.

Saudi Arabia reforming…what? I didn’t know that. I been hearing different. Liberty in Middle East…uh, unless they want to have the liberty to kill us.

Uh oh, setting up war in Iran. No nukes. We gonna kick some ass if ya’ll don’t listen.

Holly just walked in and is unsure how I can even stomach to hear his voice…LOL.

“free and democratic Iran” great line, but delusional. No way he wants this.

He needs a better speech writer. Mish mash gobbledygook.

Fear alert: enemy out there and WILL attack us. Thanks Homeland Security. Yeah, thanks guys for opening my suitcase each and every time.

Patriot Act reauthorization

Wiretapping…”international communications”…has prevented attacks…which attacks??? he doesn’t say. right side stands…left side sits. Hillary laughing. I’m laughing. Bushie winks and has a bully evil look now. I’m the motherfucking man, bitches…da prez…don’t mess with Texas ya’ll!

If America don’t lead nobody else will…the world would be a dark place…blah, blah. Dude, get real. We are no fucking angels. Give it up.

Economy is healthy and vigorous…ya. good. tell that to Ford workers and GM workers. Taxes…likes immigrants. don’t tell that to your minutemen. hell, i got 3 that work for me at the ranch!

he has an agenda for generating jobs now? bit late for that man. tax relief buzzword. club for growth BS. Renew the tax relief…or Americans will get a tax increase. Nice bait and switch there. push through a tax “cut” then say “oh no we can’t RAISE taxes”.

…tuning out again…incredibly weak speech thus far.

Invokes Clinton – dad likes him. LOL. Nice try…Hillary not amused.

Social Security..dems go nuts…create a commission to study baby boom effect on Social Securty…uh, gonna fuck it up? maybe?

American worker (cough, Ford, cough, GM) is the best. Immigration is the problem? Secure borders. There is the minuteman pandering. But immigrants are important no?

Health care…affordable. Hey George! My shit went up 31% this year! Thanks bud! Tort reform is the key right? I bet. Shithead. HSAs. LOL. 31% bro…31%. Have I mentioned my shit went up 31%?

LMAO…medical liability reform. knew it was comin’.

Oil…haha…addicted to oil. this should be good. alternative energy. the base is not pleased. Coal, solar, wind, and noocular. nice rhetoric george. likes hybrid and hydrogen…ethanol…6 years. walk the fuckin’ talk boys. gonna love following this. replace 75% of oil from middle east by 2025. Saudi’s are pissed. ringing the hotline now. no way this happens. RHETORIC.

Education. some initiative. blah, blah. yeah, sure. whatever. who is on American Idol next? Hello!

R&D tax credit. R&D good…taxes bad…

Fewer abortions…but we still gotta ban the shit. That was a good one. Abstinence and adoption. dems and reps proud…blah.

Ethics…haha. Activists courts redefine marriage. what? reminder: REPUBLICANS are the ethic violators!

Supreme Court. Roberts and Alito…take a drink. no legislate from the bench. thanks sandra day…now move along bitch. go sam go!

human cloning…creating human embryos for experiments – who the hell does that? dumbass Americans will not think stem cell research means that.

tuning out again…All americans protected by justice and equal in hope…unless you are fucking gay or something hell – we can’t go there…duh.

i’m sorry, but this fucker truly is an idiot. there we go with the “faith based groups”…now they are gonna be involved in AIDS testing. groovy. let’s just train all our preachers in medicine and we can lower health care costs.

invokes lincoln and MLK.

God Bless America!

Horribly weak speech. I look for a bit of a bounce just because people are ignorant…but it shouldn’t be much.

Let’s follow that oil thing closely. Saudis are gonna lose their minds over this one.

Very weak speech. Be fun to see the responses.

Evangelize!
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  • Paul Minor

    Eric, you are more of a man than me. Just couldn’t, wouldn’t, didn’t consider giving it or the pre or post hype a NY minute of my time, and I’ve been a political junkie forever. I guess I do have my limits and this one was only going to be a pukefest at best, or a frustration bomb on the other side.

    I won?t be able to escape the post SOTU re-hash completely of course as it will bombard me from all media angles. And unfortunately at my shiny corporate office complex it’s hey Fox Muse Channel 24/7 in the commons area I must pass through every time I go anywhere at the place of my employment. So that will be nice.

    Plunderbund brought me the only means by which I could stomach the event, the blink journalism in fact was the only way to fly through this night and still have some semblance of being a responsible staying connected kind of citizen and maintain healthy vitals. But perfect really. In fact, for all Rove/Cheney events going forward, I would prefer them to be of the Eric-blink-jo format. Much easier to deal with.

    And yes, blah, blah, purple fingers of freedom until the evil doers are no more and blah blah blah with the terrorism protection program and the HSAs fer the masses, etc, etc. Go God, Go USA!!! (suckers) That’s about it. I would disagree a little however, Bush doesn’t need a new speech writer, this Nation needs a new media, one that entices and encourages folks to really question, by doing the same. But without a new paradigm or some heretofore unforeseen development in media creation and distribution, or some nationwide Katrina-like event that really puts the average white band through some serious muck and significantly curtails their purchases of Chinese shit from Wallyworld and pharmaceuticals and oil, well, then his speechwriter is really suited just fine for what we’ve got now.

    Rove found the near-perfect political puppet, and tonight I’m sure for Karl it was probably just like watching Westminster in Madison Square Garden for him. And, if all went well Georgie read all of his pre-prepared lines well with no major, major guffaws and hit his punctuation points perfectly and his gallery of cronies and co-conspirators did cheer in kind and carried their portion of the show. And yes his numbers will bounce, and the state of our democracy’s continued demise is, uh, well, strong!

    Un Paid advertisement: After watching the SOTU do you suffer from the affects of Rove/Cheney Irritable Morale Syndrome? Well then ask your doctor about Blink-Jo from Plunderbund.

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