Please Tell CNN: NO MORE ANNA NICHOLE SMITH

  • Posted by Joseph
  • March 26, 2007

It’s back today. I thought it was gone- but it’s not. It got so bad I had to shut off my television.

Please help me.

Please.

Take 10 seconds and go to CNN’s Feedback Form and enter a message like this:

DEAR CNN,

PLEASE STOP! WE DON’T CARE ABOUT ANNA NICHOLE SMITH. WE DON’T CARE HOW SHE DIED OR IF SHE SUFFERED. WE DON’T WANT TO SEE ANY MORE ANNA NICHOLE B-ROLL.

PLEASE, PLEASE STOP TALKING ABOUT HER- AND GO BACK TO SHOWING REAL NEWS.

THANK YOU.

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March 26th, 2007
4 Responses
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Comment Number:
1
Written by:
Eric
Posted on:
March 26, 2007 at 2:00 pm

All caps. Yes. THAT’s how you get taken seriously. Spot on!

Comment Number:
2
Written by:
Eric
Posted on:
March 26, 2007 at 2:02 pm

I’ll be damned. I tried it. CNN replied:

DEAR DUMBASS,

WE DON’T CARE WHAT YOU THINK! THIS SHIT GETS RATINGS AND YOU ARE WATCHING CNN IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DAY! HELLO! CAN YOU SAY SOAP OPERA! JESUS H. FUCKING CHRIST SOME OF YOU POLITICAL BLOGGING PEOPLE THINK YOU OWN THE WORLD WITH YOUR LITTLE HIGH AND MIGHTY “TALK ABOUT SOMETHING THAT MATTERS” SHIT! THIS CRAPOLA DOES MATTER TO PEOPLE WATCHING OUR PROGRAM AT THIS TIME OF DAY. WAKE THE fuck UP!

REGARDS,

ANDERSON AND FRIENDS

Anderson having a bad day i guess…

Comment Number:
3
Written by:
Joseph
Posted on:
March 26, 2007 at 2:04 pm

Yes. With all caps- it’s like you are yelling at them.

Also- you might consider adding multiple exclamation points at the end of every sentence.

I heard they forward emails with more than 10 exclamation points directly to the news director.

Comment Number:
4
Written by:
Joseph
Posted on:
March 26, 2007 at 2:10 pm

You might be right- since the other options are (in order by cable channel):

The Nanny (from 1998)
Montel Williams
General Hospital
Judge Joe Brown
America’s Funniest Home Videos (from 2002)
Guiding Light