How Kevin ?Mad Dog? Coughlin Spent His Summer

This recent article from the Plain Dealer is proof that Mark Naymik can actually be quite funny when he wants.

In it, he composes fake “how I spent my summer” letters to Ted Strickland from misc. Ohio politicians.

This one is my favorite:

Dear Governor:

If you don?t know me by now, you should. I?m the real boss of Summit County?s Republican Party. And though my party is about as popular as toys from China right now, I still have statewide ambition. I could have your job in 2010.

I?ve spent a decade in Columbus as state representative and senator from Cuyahoga Falls. My attractive family is featured in all of my commercials.

This summer, I began organizing a coup against Summit County GOP Chairman Alex Arshinkoff, who raises and spends big money but has little to show for it. And he makes decisions all the time without my input. You may have heard me blast him on Cleveland?s local NPR station, WCPN. (Too bad the only listeners were liberals from Cleveland Heights and Oberlin.)

I have lined up support from dozens of leaders whom I can?t name right now. But trust me: I have a lot of closeted support. If I can just get the support of our babe-liscious state auditor, Mary Taylor ? who?s from my county ? I could lock up this whole thing right now.

Let?s keep up the bipartisanship!

Sincerely,

Kevin ?Mad Dog? Coughlin