Breaking out of Columbus: Dispatch Hides Bill Todd’s Alleged Dendrophilia!

  • Posted by Eric
  • November 2, 2007

Unbelievable. First the PeeDee and now THIS! Jerid has the details on how the Columbus Dispatch is sitting on a massive story that would bring the Republican Summer of Love to a shattering climax. It seems Bill Todd is rumored to be suffering from an incurable case of Dendrophilia. What’s that you might ask? Well…um. It’s kinda hard to explain. I’ll just blurt it out: Mr. Todd is allegedly a tree fucker.

I hope Mr. Todd will seek immediate treatment if this story is true. I can understand why the Dispatch does not want to print such a story. It would send shockwaves through political and arborist circles alike…and might just cost him the mayoral race that some idiot wingnuts think is close! I hear there are “sources” on this one, so don’t laugh too hard.

In the interest of an informed public, I give you the following PSA:

WARNING: The following video may not be suitable for certain audiences. If you have a very poor sense of humor, are offended easily, eschew profanity, or would not like to view simulated sex acts with trees, you should not hit play below! [You’ve been warned. No whining]

OK, now you can laugh hard!

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November 2nd, 2007
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Comment Number:
1
Written by:
Matt N.
Posted on:
November 2, 2007 at 6:56 pm

It probably isn’t smart to post this. You just let the cat out of the bag about what Equality Ohio’s next mission is.

Comment Number:
2
Written by:
Eric
Posted on:
November 2, 2007 at 8:33 pm

#1: Or maybe you could get Bill Todd to mention something about the North American Man Tree Love Association? ROFL! It almost worked once…why not try it again?